Self esteem is something we should all have, but in reality, self esteem is something we all struggle with from time to time, if not all the time. And there’s lots of tips and hacks out there to raise your self esteem, but one writer says you should forget most of what you read about self esteem and follow these four simple steps. Here they are.

When it comes to self esteem, Kris Gage identifies four A’s to strive for: agency, awareness, authenticity, and action.

Here’s a quick breakdown of each one, and why they’ll raise your self esteem.

Agency

Instead of thinking about the external factors that are lowering your self-esteem, remember that you’re the agent, and in charge of how you feel. In short, the one and only thing really raises or lowers your self esteem is you.

Awareness

When you’re not present and facing your current emotions and thoughts, you’re  either living in the past or the future. And if you’re not living in the present moment, you can’t be aware of who you are. That makes it difficult to cope with emotions and create action plans.

Authenticity

What is it that you really and truly want? It’s hard to know if you’re not aware of yourself, and even harder if you seek outside validation and base your wants on what other people want. But by being authentic, and asking yourself honest question – and expecting honest answers – you become authentic and this raises your self esteem.

Action

When you’re aware of yourself and what you want, you can actually take action and commit to doing things that fulfill you (not other people). This final step is all about taking responsibility for your own happiness and making it happen.

So, the next time you feel your self esteem plummeting, think of these four A’s, and give them a try.