The last time you did something embarrassing, did your mind fill with negative self talk? For many women, the answer is yes. And while we feel like we deserve this negativity, it’s no way to treat ourselves. For one thing, it makes it harder to recover from our social faux pas. For another thing, it only keeps us feeling bad about ourselves. So, here are 4 tips to help you nip this negative self talk in the bud.

Switch the focus away from yourself

It’s easy to get stuck inside a negative loop that replays over and over again. When you notice this happening, make a conscious effort to move your attention away from yourself and focus on someone else. 

Get curious about them and engage in conversation. Not only do people like talking about themselves, but it also helps you stop saying negative things about yourself.

Have a rescue affirmation

First, choose an affirmation that feels reassuring and loving. Then, when you notice the negative self talk starting, pull out your affirmation and say it mindfully. 

Your affirmation can be, “I release this judgement and choose to feel good.” Or, “I release these negative thoughts and choose peace.”

Laugh at yourself

Laughing at yourself isn’t the same as negative self talk. Instead, learn to see the humor in what happened. This takes pressure off yourself. Plus, it’s a great reminder that you – like everyone else – makes mistakes. It’s human and normal, and yes, even funny.

Choose to feel good

When you mess up, negative self talk is the easiest thing to do – it’s the path of least resistance. But you can swim upstream and choose to feel good. 

You can say, “No, I’m not going to make myself feel bad.” Instead, you get to be the one who lets yourself feel good. What’s more, you get to do things that make you feel good.